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Middle bit of 2014
Sales have been off the chart ...
... bringing the usual stock shortages so I have been exploring all avenues ... if you want yours explored email me! |
Charcoal Making just didn't ...
... happen last year for time and weather reasons. Tom was building his house and we could never get the 3 days close together necessary to build, burn and bag.
I suspect that it will probably continue to be the case as money wise it just isn't worth it so it has to be for love. My mate Colin loves being at the woods so I imported him from Switzerland where he now lives to be chief air intake and burn coordinator.
With the stack of Coppice Wood ...
... having sat by the burner for two years once loaded it fired up easily. Since our first efforts we have improved our technique a bit copying the experts and what was once a smokey ball ache getting the lid on is a doddle when you have it in place wedged by long sticks.
The results were spectacular ... ly shite. On cracking it open two days later it was totally undercooked and the yield was next to nothing. So, we'll have to go again if we can find the time and enthusiasm and in the meantime charcoal is again out of stock!
The result was crap but the first day was fun and no hours of work bagging up the charcoal! |
I read somewhere that Oranges ...
can be either male or female ...
... The males sometimes unexpectedly squirt in your eye and the females are bitter for no apparent reason.
On another note as summer hit it's peak there was good news for insomnia suffers ... only 5 sleeps to Christmas! |
You can't beat a nice Pair ...
... but in my 15 or so years in this game I haven't got my hands on a nice Pear Tree - until now. I sent John the Madge into the local big boy Tree Surgeons to see if there was anything interesting and he reported the presence of a 5 foot by 2 foot wide specimen.
I popped over for a squeeze and bought it, well you have to get it whilst it's going, eh. That size sits nicely on my trailer and in no time it was at the woods and on The Saw.
The figure and colour ...
... as shown below speak for themselves. My only regret is that it's so hard to find timber this good, particularly fruitwood as some numpty often cuts it up for logs - sacrilege!
The tragedy for you dear reader is that I will probably have sold it all before you see it |
The Pitmaster BBQ Lads ...
... and of course ladies are amiably very competitive and produce high quality food across a range of disciplines. I've been sponsoring a local team led by Steve Heyes for a few years and it's very good for business!
There are now hundred's of members of the British BBQ Society and the word about my wares gets passed around without me having to do or more importantly spend anything.
Steve was a founder member and is now pretty experienced and though he was won many sections runner up to Grand Champion was his previous best effort.
No longer the Bridesmaid he ...
... was on fire unlike his food which smashed the opposition see the trophies below. Congrats to the Jedi Swine Tricks BBQ !
I'm told his tongue is pretty good too! He followed this success with Grand Champion at Grillstock |
Whilst getting the Pear ...
... I was shown a promising stack of Sweet Chestnut, a timber I like and want more of. I was late meeting a customer so I had to come back a few days later. In between I put a call in to Steve at Helmdon Sawmill asking what to look out for as I had some in the past with nasty stain.
I was very pleased I spoke to Steve ...
... as he said the important thing to look out for is ring shake (wouldn't want to catch it myself!) something Chestnut is prone to suffer from and makes the wood useless as it falls to bits. So, armed with this knowledge I looked closer and saw it was riddled and withdrew my interest.
Got a bit of Walnut ...
... that might interest you Luke the tree surgeon said pointing to a lump right on top of a big stack of firewood. Assuming it was just being firewooded I put an offer in but he wanted 25% more which I agreed to as he may think of me before chopping up future stuff.
It's not the best bit I've ever seen but with a good telehandler on site it's on the trailer & at the woods with no extra expense or back breaking effort |
A woman was in town on a shopping trip ...... when her mobile phone rang notifying her that her husband had just been in a terrible car accident and was in critical condition in the ICU. She decided to get in a couple of more shops before heading to the hospital.
When she arrived the doctor glared at her and shouted, 'You went ahead and finished your shopping trip didn't you! It's just as well you did, because it will more than likely be the last shopping trip you ever take! For the rest of his life...
... he will require round-the-clock care. And YOU will now be his carer! The woman was feeling so guilty she broke down and sobbed.
The lady doctor then chuckled and said, 'I'm just pulling your leg.. He's dead.
Show me what you bought.
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Free Timber with a catch ...
... comes up quite often. Sometimes the catch is merely having to get it which if there is access and lifting gear is a yes please no matter what hardwood it is.
Bad access and lack of hydraulics need closer exam - I had to walk away from a nice bit of Yew as the price was moving several tons of ringed huge Sycamore down a steep bank.
Walnut in Winchester ...
... are three words Andy has notified me of in the past and been good, see old blogs. This was was much harder up the top of a steep bank on a terraced house and needed carrying through the house.
The job was put off twice due to rain and by the time Rob was back from his 8th holiday of the year Andy was away on a building job.
Rob is highly skilled ...
... with the Alaskan Mill but this was a challenge even to him. The picture below doesn't do justice to the slope and tight working but this video on You Tube is worth a look as is any young lady bending over displaying her thong.
Rather Rob than me ... I sat on the safe end and filmed! |
The increase in parcels of Smoking Wood going out ...
... inevitably causes a bit of agg usually when the local driver is on holiday and some poor sod who doesn't know the area with 100 collections and deliveries to do cocks it up.
Having failed to collect on Monday by Wednesday there were six to go, two going to a Street Food regular who wanted it urgently and the other 4 to BBQ lads.
I emailed them a day or so later and all but one said it hadn't turned up and the other was delighted to get 6 boxes of wood for his £42!
You would hope sorting that out ...
... isn't too challenging - send someone to collect the 5 boxes that shouldn't be in Norwich and send them to the right places.
This apparently is beyond the people on the help lines .. you can't phone them you have to 'chat' which takes 30 minutes explaining and is too complicated for them to understand so they have to pass to their supervisor.. do it all again only to be told I need to speak to courier support who only work Mon- Fri 9 -5
I have to go and kill myself ...
... I type into the f-ing chat box. I'm sorry to hear that Paul they reply ... that one is obviously on the function buttons as they use that a lot. I can't help feeling that really and truely they aren't that sorry! - what d'you think? Answers on a post card. Mary had a little dress ...
... with a split right up the sides & when she moved and swayed her hips the boys could see her thighs.
Now, Mary had another dress with a split right up the front - but she never wore that one!
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The search for Timber ...
... was given a boost by Dave one of my regulars who sells his wide range of 'things' across several market stalls and had got talking to a Ranger from a trust that manages woodland in the nice bit of Surrey hills.
After putting me in touch with Leo the Ranger we met up and I have bought some great Holly see below and agreed to buy some Ash and Sycamore with other goodies to come in the future. Selling timber is easy, finding it isn't so if you have any leads ping me and I may be grateful!
Holly this width is rare ... It's a sod to work apparently but those that master it love it!
The above is cut and drying ...
... as are a few other bits of interest - Walnut of course, some slightly rippled Sycamore and pippy Yew. Just four planks of beautiful burr Elm certainly the best I've ever had.
I've got a bid in for what I've been promised is top brown Oak so more about that next time. Also in the pipeline is more wonderful (I hope) Walnut and just maybe London Plane.
As usual I'll sign off with a "come and visit " - bring paper containing pictures of the Queen and I may find you some timber.
rgs
Paul GOULDEN
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